“And also with… your spirit?” oops….
Yes, even a year later I still
catch myself saying the “old” Mass responses… and Yes, I do realize I’ve
been to Mass about 368 times since it’s been changed (AT LEAST). But just recently
I’ve been having trouble with one response in particular.
It’s the phrase directly after we say the Lamb of God when
the priest elevates Jesus in the chalice and the host.
We
used to say, “Lord I am not worthy
to receive You, but only say the word and I shall be healed.”
Now we say, “Lord I am not worthy that You should enter under
my roof, but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.”
Last year, when I found out that we were changing that
phrase, I was devastated. My whole life I had said that prayer and I felt very
attached to it. Throughout my life I had never left the Church, but as a
teenager I definitely went through a period of doubt and skepticism of the
Church and especially the Eucharist. However, It was THIS phrase that played a
major role in my mini-conversion and journey back to a great love of the Church
and an intense love for Jesus in the Eucharist.
So when I heard that that the phrase was being changed,
every fiber of my being revolted. The poor Sister who told me that phrase was
being changed… I was not a happy camper. She found that out right away.
The first time I actually heard the new response I thought
to myself, “Why the heck are we
talking about roofs in the middle of Mass??” I remember complaining to Jesus
about all the reasons why I didn’t like this new response: It was weird that we
were talking about roofs…I thought it sounded awkward…I liked the word
“receive” and now it wasn’t there…It didn’t “draw me into the moment”…blah,
blah, blah…
In the midst of my soliloquy of complaints I had the
revelation that no matter how much I complained, the phrase wasn’t going to
magically change AND (most importantly)
if I truly believed that the Catholic Church was founded by Christ and that the
Pope, who is the head of the church, is a successor of Peter and Peter was
chosen by Jesus Himself, THEN I had
better listen to what the Church had to say because Christ speaks through His
Church.
Needless to say, once I accepted this, I’ve found that the
words “aren’t so bad”.
One day at Mass I was praying with this phrase and I was
deeply struck by the beginning, “Lord, I am not worthy that You should enter
under my roof…” As I said these words in unison with the rest of the
congregation, I heard them in a new light.
I thought about how I
am
a human person, both body and soul, made in the image and likeness of God. Therefore,
I am a temple of the Holy Spirit.
I am a temple. So as I say this
response, I am really inviting the Lord into my
temple.
I then reflected on how often I’ve “dirtied the temple” by
my sin. This is when I was hit with the power of the second part of this
phrase, “…but only say the word and my soul shall be healed.” By one word Jesus can restore the
“cleanliness” and original beauty of my soul. There is so much more to it but, as
Catholics, we believe that through the power of the Sacrament of Confession,
our souls are restored to their full beauty. This is why it is so important to go to confession. We ARE
NOT worthy to receive this incredible and wonderful gift of sacrifice,
but when we are healed, when we are restored to worthiness through confession,
we ARE
able to worthily partake of this beautiful sacrifice. Jesus loves us so
much that He wants nothing more than
to be intimately close to us. Who are we to deny Him that closeness? Let us go
to confession often so as to prepare our “temple” to receive the Body and Blood
of our Beloved Jesus!